The Cost of Discipleship

I read a verse today. I didn't like it at first. It convicted me, it was a challenge, and it was extremely hard to swallow. But it completely changed my life. In the Gospel of Luke, a large crowd is gathering around Jesus, and He says to them in chapter 14, verse 33: "In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple." I was immediately taken back when I read this. How could I have missed this before? Surely, Jesus could not be serious, could He? I began trying to find a loophole, looking for someway that I could say that this particular verse didn't apply to me. But I couldn't find one. No matter what I did, or where I turned, this verse was still in front of me. I couldn't evade it.

Yes, of course I want to be Christ's disciple. Of course I want to have a relationship with Him, where He teaches, and comforts, and loves me. But I have to give up everything in order to have that? Giving up everything is hard! And it was at this point, when I was debating within me this cost and how large it was, that I realized just how much like the rich, young ruler in Luke 18 I really am.

"When Jesus heard this, He said to him, 'You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.' When he heard this, he became very sad, because he was very wealthy. Jesus looked at him and said, 'How hard it is for the rich to enter the kingdom of God! Indeed, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.'"  -Luke 18:22-23

Before, when I read this story, I would subconsciously condemn this guy, thinking that I was nothing like him, and nod with agreement with Jesus. But now I get it. I am just like the rich man, and I have never seen it before. And I am certain that I am not the only one. What does it say about our hearts when we have a debate within ourselves as to whether we should truly listen to this verse, or not? How have I become so attached to these transient things around me that the ultimatum by Christ to be His disciple scares me? But the key word here is 'transient'.

The things of this world, they will not last. It's all a vapor. But a relationship with Christ, that is something that is eternal.  And when my eyes were opened to this fact in light of Christ's ultimatum, I realized how much of a fool I would be than to choose other than Christ. Jim Elliot said, "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." Who wouldn't choose something of eternal value over something trivial that will fade?

And so, I had a choice to make. Would I choose Christ, or would I choose my things? Would I choose Christ, or would I choose what gave me a false sense of control and security? Would I choose Christ, the One who never fades, and who loves me more than I could ever hope to love Him back, or would I choose the transient, cold vapors of this life? And so, I chose Christ. I will desire a relationship with Him, and to truly be His disciple above all else, and will therefore, give everything up to follow Him. He can have it because I want Him more, and I cannot keep it.

 I'm gonna need Your help on this, Lord.

"The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it." -Matthew 13:44-45